Me and Conservatism

I can understand being frugal, saving up for things is hard and sometimes when unexpected events happen, you have to go without a bit, prioritise as you see other people spend money on things without a care in the world. Delayed gratification, self-discipline these are traits that are useful to navigate this world. I saw a bit of that growing up, my mum worked full time after she split up with Brian and we went without a bit, not too much but as a kid, you notice these things, my kids don't get everything they want, and that breaks my heart sometimes, but I love them as much as my mum loves me, which is infinite. My mother, well I couldn't put into words how much I love her, and I am a pretty verbose man.

I do not blame the people who choose not to work, when they can make a decent living off of leaving their pride on stand by whilst they either go to the benefits office to sign on or the doctors to get another assessment, and if your rent is paid, your council tax is a notional thing then you can have money for things - when you see that most unqualified positions are minimum wage, why would you? Pride is nice but it doesn't put an IPhone in your back pocket. They are merely a symptom or simply intuitively and instinctively smart enough to not buy into the idea that working hard is at all noble.

Working hard is noble if you love what you do - otherwise its at best necessary to pretend to, I love what I am doing at the moment.

Because they serve a purpose to certain people - and its not just benefit claimants, its Moslems, european migrants, asylum seekers, gays, lesbians, the elderly,the homeless, vegetarians(Insert the tabloid target here)

If we have these people to blame, to project our frustrations onto, then we do not have to look at why we work the longest hours in Europe, why we have a minimum wage rather than a living wage, why we see these fellow human beings as something lesser than us rather than people. You know people like your friends, your parents, your lovers - they speak different languages and hold different values but ultimately, they are us. Maybe they dont see things the way you do, but I bet you do not hold the same opinions throughout your life, do you? If you actually looked at these people and saw them as people, not as projections of your own frustrations and envy, you should then ask why am I being directed to hate these people?

We have a government who specialise in divide and rule, where they point out and remove the protections that are the mark of a mature society and claim it is for our own good, when in truth it is merely to allow private enterprise to swallow up more of the things that we rely upon when we are weakest. Not everything should or could be run for a profit, it does not mean that it will be more efficient or that it will offer more, but that it will be run to make money.

Compassion is not trendy or clever, it has been made to feel mawkish and weak, but it is not, compassion is the deepest strength you can have as a man or a woman and it is something that I do not believe this government has, collectively. Compassion is not about doing things for people that they could do themselves, it is about doing things for those who cannot do for themselves, it is about helping them help themselves, and in truth, getting them jobs isn't the solution, it should be about getting them good jobs that pay a decent wage, that their rights are protected and that they are not fucking demonised by the same ideas that paid them off with disability benefit twenty years ago.

My tutor Pete said that " Love goes out the window when poverty moves in" We need love because a lot of people are going to be poor, or a lot poorer very soon. I don't think that money is a virtue, it is an illusion that stops us from asking why are things this way? We are at the mercy of impersonal forces, of individual mistakes and ideologies that crush our dreams and our hopes. We need love right now, more than ever. And I love you. Because you're you, and you are making the best decisions you can, same as I am. I don't judge you, I just wish you well. I am angry a lot not because I am worried that I am being screwed out of something, but because I do not feel that the world works for most of us, we have to fight for whatever small amount of joy we can gather to ourselves. I am proud of where and who I am, I was raised by good people, decent family who enabled me to think for myself. I want better for all of us.