Roo-Neh

So as the majority of people are sat around wondering what the fuck is going to happen to them, spare a thought for poor old Wayne, having his agent haggle his way out of a club that made him into an icon, preparing for a birthday party that will no doubt make the pages of the weeklies, snide comments about his sexual appetite and attendant lack of impulse control even as they write cheques for access. Poor old Wayne Rooney.

I have actually read his autobiography, and found on paper, he seems quietly pleasant - loves his missus, good at a sport that people revere as much as religion - someone you could probably have a drink with and not want to glass him, but why do we revere these people so much?

Not in terms of their talent, I think that we all are drawn to the the work, the expression of a great talent in a way that goes to our subconscious but are you not a little bit fatigued with the football coverage in certain parts of the media?

The sport leaves me cold - in comparision with something like MMA, which is all sports boiled down to the essential conflict, and populated by far less gang rape and drunk driving, football is cossetted and overly effete. If we are going to have conflict, make it real instead of private boxes and subscription - although the thing I do like about football is the love it gets at the lowest levels, my brother coaches his stepson's team and his enthusiasm is palpable.

Still, if and when Rooney bags a good deal, he'll be scorned by all the United fans and former team mates, the press will tear even more chunks out of his hide and I cannot see him at a foreign club - imagine Rooney eating at an Italian restaurant and his disappointed childs face that his spag bol isn't made with Ragu, eh?